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Friday, January 05, 2007
Lazy Language Rant
It's time for a language rant - it's been brewing for some years now, but it's time to commit it to paper. Lazy language tics drive me insane. Even more irritating is the tendency of people to adopt words or phrases that EVERYONE uses. I've read about the tendency of high schoolers (and really, anyone under the age of 50) to interject "like" into a conversation. I am guilty of this one. For example, "I was like going to the store and like I saw my friend and she like was so excited because her and this guy were like going on a date!!!" (I'm not quite over the top like that though.) Okay, anyone reading this knows that the "her" is incorrect and should be "she," but the more immediate irritation is the "like."

Another lazy language thing - instead of using the correct prefix to indicate a negative: misunderstanding, invisible, disconnected, unpopular - some will just say "Not" and then the word. "That is so not cool." "That cord is so not connected." Of course, that "so not (fill in the blank)" substitution may be preferable to hearing nonunderstood, unvisible, misconnected, or dispopular.Then came "amazing." Everything in the universe is "amazing." There are no levels, no gradations, no good, better, or best. It's ALL amazing. Small children, old people - this word has no age limit. I say, Buy a thesaurus people!! God's grace is amazing. A breathtaking sunset is amazing. Sometimes even technology is amazing. But really, everything can't be amazing or nothing is.

Another interjection that drives me mad because it is both annoying and pretentious is "sort of." Sometimes a thing can be sort of cold or sort of hot or sort of pretty or sort of tight. But the way it's abused in coversation is more like - "I was sort of going to the store and bumped into a sort of friend. She sort of said, would you sort of like to attend this wine tasting with me." Yeah, sort of. I hear it used mostly by academics and Hollywood wonks. It is often used in a place in the sentence where the following words can't be "sort of" anything! Irritating.

An expression that's recently gotten my attention is when someone answers a question in the affirmative with the staccato "yeah yeah yeah yeah." Listen for it. My understanding is that it's used to let the speaker know that the listener is on the same page, knows where the speaker is going with his or her thought, and wants to chime in with some kind of feedback and agreement at the same time. I think that the "yeah yeah yeah yeah" cuts off the speaker in a rather dismissive way. Better to nod and make good eye contact to let the speaker know the listener is, in fact,listening.

Finally, for today, is an expression I heard in October. Because the woman using it had a very slight drawl, I thought it was a regional thing. A waiter asked if she'd like a drink - she said, "You know what? I'd like..." You know what? Where does that come from? I've heard it a few more times since then, and I don't get it. If someone asks a question, they probably don't know the answer, so prefacing the answer with "You know what?" is, as so many of these expressions are, superfluous, and irritating. I know now that "You know what?" not regional because when I was at Linen's N Things the other day, a customer asked the clerk where she could find something. The clerk was an older guy with no discernable accent. I nearly wanted to slap him. He began his response with, "You know what?" If she knew, she wouldn't have asked him!

It's like so many filler words that are just used to buy the speaker time; the way "well" is sometimes used as a tether - as long as words are coming out of our mouths, we hope they will stay and listen and not interrupt. Silence is just too scary in this noisy world, and with our short attention spans, we feel like we can keep hold of our listeners if we just keep making noise. No silence, no pauses,just blah blah blah.I was thinking like, You know what?, get a clue! That is so not cool! I sort of am thinking that if I like slap you, you like won't talk like that anymore! And that would be AMAZING!!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006
The Nativity Scene
When my kids were much younger, they attended a Montessori school. The Montessorians were carefully agnostic. One December day, a parent brought in a Menorah to tell the story of Channukah. Of course I went right out and bought a small nativity set to tell the story of Christmas. I wasn't about to let that opportunity pass. I went to Pic 'n Save and bought a small set, roughly painted, made in China. That small set was the first nativity scene I'd ever had. My mother had painted a beautiful ceramic set when I was young, and nothing I'd ever seen in a store could compare.Since that time, I have bought several other sets. Usually on sale after Christmas. Stephanie gave me a beautiful white set with gold trim two years ago. I put them up this year, and I love them.Of course, we all know that the scene is staged. We know the Wise Men didn't come the day after Jesus was born - they saw the star and came a year or so later. (And Bible scholars out there? How long did they take to arrive?) We know that Jesus was swaddled and it was probably cold in that cave or outbuilding. So my little Baby Jesus' with their arms outstretched and the little piece of fabric to cover the diaper area - also fiction. My favorite is that Mary is often depicted kneeling next to the baby with her hands together in prayer. Well, I've had three babies, and there was no kneeling - there was laying in bed and calling for ice packs! There was praying - but for a good night's sleep. My nativity scenes are in need of some glue and touch ups with a Sharpie. Why do the horns of the cow and the ears of the donkey always break? Actually, due to a calamitous falling-shelf incident last year, on one of my mini-nativities, with just the "holy family," Joseph is actually headless. Rather sad. So I must set aside one day soon with tweezers, magnifiers, reading glasses, glue, and acetone (to remove the glue that sticks my fingers together - yes, I've done it before) and repair all the chips and cracks and decapitations.And I must always remember not to forget the story behind the little vignettes that are staged on my tables and shelves. I think about Mary, and that song, "Mary Did You Know?" I wonder if she had any idea, really, that the infant she gave birth to would change the world. That during that dark time in history, the Deliverer finally came - as a baby. In a manger. For me. And for you.

Saturday, November 25, 2006
Holidays in a Time of Loss
The holidays snuck up on me again this year. Last year at this time I was racing toward the finish line of the long race to earn my college degree. Decorating was last on my list of things to think about, so it wasn't until after finals that I really got into the festivities. I vowed that this year, I would start pulling out my snow globe collection and decorations in October. Okay, so here it is, the weekend after Thanksgiving, and the only decorations that are out are the ones that are always out. But at this time of anticipation of celebrating the birth of our Savior and Lord (yes, I know He wasn't born on December 25, but someone had to pick a day), there may be threads of sadness, depression, and disappointment that weave throughout the shimmer and shine of celebration. These feelings are normal and typical, but not easy. It would be easy to just stop decorating, stop celebrating, stop buying and making gifts (I love my iPod, but homemade gifts rock!). It would be easy to stop playing the carols of joy and exhultation. It would be easy to hide at home until it's all over and nothing remains but the boxes and torn paper and dried and droopy pointsettias.The hardest part of the holidays is remembering the ones who have left us behind. We cry when we think of how it should be, how they should be here, and how we should be together for all the holidays. We miss them whether they've been gone months or years, but it's especially bitter when they've left us too young. Things will never be the same. God never promised that things would stay the same, but that knowledge doesn't assuage the grief that overwhelms us at the most inconvenient times.May God give us the joy of the birth of Jesus, the consolation that we will see our family again, and the knowledge of the truth that the Savior of the World came for each and every one of us.


Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Faith
Faith is hard - it's the hardest thing I've ever done. I haven't read anywhere in the Bible that it's an easy walk. I know without a doubt, and I'm betting my eternal life on the fact, that God is the God of the universe, that Jesus is his son and the only way to heaven. But there are days where my faith is so weak that I keep going only because I know that God says he'll keep his promises. I'm relying on his promises - not that my faith is strong, but he is trustworthy. When any person says, "Trust me," I don't. I trust no one. But I trust God. So when things are bad, and they often are, I keep going because God has proven himself true before and will again.How can someone lose a brother or sister, a parent, or a friend, and get out of bed every day? It is a statement of faith to say they are in heaven, they haven't really died, they've just moved into the presence of the Almighty. It is a human fact that they are gone from us and we still have to keep living, keep breathing, keep being in the world when we don't want to be. But that living, that breathing, that being - that's obedience, and trusting that God still has work for us here to do. Oh that he would show me that work.

Monday, September 18, 2006
David
David Edward Ayala 11/16/88 - 9/15/06
God took a young man home on Friday night. His last few years were not easy, but he was a dearly loved son and brother, grandson, nephew, and cousin. Hearts are broken at this most grievous loss. Pray for his mother, who loved him so.

Friday, June 23, 2006
The World is Loud
I am, and have always been, very sensitive to light and sound. I have a little control over the light - sunglasses, curtains, etc. But the world outside my home has gotten so loud that I can hardly bear to be in it. My family is used to me turning down radios and televisions, and have stopped being exasperated with me when I ask waitresses to turn down the music in restaurants. But sometimes there is no way to turn down the noise and it's often deafening. Literally. I read that by the time kids are high school seniors, over 70 percent of them have some hearing loss. IPods, car stereos, computers, live performances - they all steal away some hearing, and hearing can't be regained. When it's gone, it's gone.
I don't get how it's fun for people to go out to very noisy venues, clubs, or ballgames, and then try to talk over that. I prefer to sit in a quiet room with soft music and enjoy the conversation without constantly hearing or saying, "What???" I know I need to be patient with people with hearing loss, but shouting and repeating give me a serious headache. I can't control the noisy world, but I wish I could just turn it down a little.

Thursday, June 22, 2006
Communication in the 21st Century
It is a profound comment on the state of the world that so many (over 80 million according to recent news reports) have joined this forum, many of whom are blogging. It's a shout out to the universe that may or may not be answered - from a friend or a complete stranger - that says, yes, I hear you. I grieve the demise of old fashioned correspondence - and the time once put into composing a short note or a long letter. Anyone who has seen Ken Burns' Civil War documentary will remember the profound letters written during those times. Not all were literary masterpieces, but many of those writers were eloquent and so memorable.